Monday 1 July 2013

Richard Driscoll sentenced to three years

The world of British horror film-making was rocked to its foundations today with the shock news that 'Honest' Richard Driscoll, popular and talented film-maker of no fixed abode, has been sentenced to three years at Her Majesty's Pleasure.

Sentencing Driscoll, Judge Pegden said: "In my opinion this was professionally planned. You used your filming expertise for the content of bogus and false invoices."

Driscoll's legions of fans (Sid and Doris Smith) argued that the miscarriage of justice was plain for all to see. "Richard Driscoll has never done anything professional in his life," said Sid. "And he ain't got no filming expertise neither," added Doris.

Actors, film crew and horror fans across Britain have expressed surprise that 'Tricky Dicky Risk-all' has been convicted of tax fraud, since most of them expected him to eventually go down for breach of contract, non-payment of wages, theft of 'borrowed' equipment, common assault or making really, really, really shit films.

David Carradine was unavailable for comment.


  1. Sad day. The industry looses the second worst movie maker. At least Neil Johnson is still around to entertain us. Looking forward to his next 3 movies.

  2. OH GOD!!! Going into prison will give him plenty of time to watch lots of films... I mean 'come up with ideas'

  3. "As well as his prison term, Driscoll was also disqualified from being a company director for seven years."

    Damn! They had to go and put the word 'company' in there didn't they?

  4. I still can’t quite work out whether I admire him of abhor him; admire him for his conviction (no, not the 3 years) and blind faith in himself. In his singular drive (like a Skoda without a steering wheel) and unwavering attention (like a blinkered horse?). Abhor him because he had no concerns about how he went about achieving his goals.

    It’s certain that his VAT fraud is by far the least of his crimes, at least morally speaking ...

    Perhaps his next movie could be about his experiences at Her Majesty’s pleasure?

    1. Only 3 years? No where near enough. And that's only based on having watched Eldorado.

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  6. I worked for this moron....& to be honest he deserves far more for what he has done to people.... Nasty piece of work, who should NEVER be trusted !