Richard Driscoll's crowdfunding ambitions

Richard Driscoll, Britain's greatest cult film-maker, has a whole bunch of projects which he is hoping to raise money for on his own personal crowdfunding site Cinebacker, which he launched last November. Let’s look at them one at a time.

Trash’s Revenge

https://cinebacker.com/pre-launch/trashs-revenge-rotld-universe/

This is the 40th anniversary Return of the Living Dead meta-sequel that Driscoll and Linnea Quigley have been touting for some time now. There was a legal hooha over the rights last year but that seems to have no been resolved. 

According to this video, many of the original ROTLD cast and crew are aboard, and anyone who is inconveniently dead can be brought back through CGI. The Cinebacker campaign for this launched four weeks ago – allegedly.

This has, according to the website (which we have no reason to doubt) raised 30 grand from 37 backers. There are some obsessive ROTLD fans out there so this is possibly true.

Apparently you will be able to be a zombie in the film by videoing yourself against a green screen. And this offers includes an IMDB listing and “photoshoot on set”. But wait, if someone is going to be on set, why would they need to be shot separately using green screen?

• Will it ever get made? Probably. But that's not the same as being released.

Who? A Clue Tribute Film

https://cinebacker.com/pre-launch/who/

"From the creators of a new murder mystery, in the spirit of Clue, comes a new murder mystery that will have you die laughing..." You can watch the rest of the promo video for yourself.

Tricky Dicky is going to star in this one himself, he tells us, using his standard 'Steven Craine' pseudonym. And it will be directed by his other pseudonym 'Chris Newman'.

The cast includes Robin Askwith (of course), Eileen Daly (of course), Eric Roberts (of course) and Jenna Jameson. I wonder if any of them know.

"Set in the dilapidated ruins of an old porno movie theater, a bizarre group of characters gathers for the reading of the will of adult film mogul James Winkle, founder of Little Winkle Pictures. But what starts as a seemingly routine event soon spirals into chaos, as the group is plunged into a murder mystery where trust is scarce and secrets abound. Each guest hides a dark past, and as tensions rise, the game of survival begins.

"Could the killer be the suspiciously helpful theater manager? Perhaps the sharp-tongued Professor Bloom? Or maybe the shadowy and ever-lurking Mr. Custard? Then there’s Miss Blue, a former adult star with unclear motives, and the lawyer conducting the will reading, who may know more than he lets on. As skeletons from their pasts emerge and bodies start to pile up, who the killer is becomes the burning question."

• Will it ever get made? Not a snowball's chance in hell.

Grindhouse 3

https://cinebacker.com/pre-launch/breeding-ground/

A three-part sequel to Driscoll's 2017 two-part anthology Grindhouse Nightmares (originally announced as Grindhouse 2, to cash in on the Tarantino/Rodruguez double-bill). Unfortunately the promo video is set to private on this one.

This will combine:

Breeding Ground, starring Michael Madsen (of course): "A young film enthusiast stumbles upon an old VHS tape at his local market. What starts as a nostalgic find quickly descends into a harrowing tale of survival. The tape reveals Hollywood legend Michael Madsen, playing himself, as he becomes embroiled in a dangerous investigation against a bloodthirsty militia with plans to overthrow the nation. Is this a snuff film documenting real events, or is it a cleverly disguised thriller?" On the other hand, a press release over on Horror Screams Video Vault describes this as "a gripping, suspense-filled zombie thriller", so who knows what it's about, if anything.

LA Takedown, starring Steven Craine (of course) and Tom Sizemore (of course). "When a high-stakes heist takes a disastrous turn, chaos erupts. As the fallout unfolds, suspicions of betrayal arise. Was someone from the crew feeding information to the police? In a web of deception and desperation, the line between friend and foe blurs." Driscoll has been touting this as a feature for a few years now over on the Maha Films website, where Julie Stevens, Adrian Dalton and Danny Lopez (of course) are listed in the cast. The still on the Cinebacker page shows Lopez, so I think this segment, at least, already exists in some form.. Tom Sizemore, of course, passed away in 2023.

Road Trip: "Brace yourself for sheer madness as Funky Frank, a deranged clown, embarks on a gruesome road trip, leaving a trail of chaos and carnage in his wake. With every mile, the body count grows in this terrifying journey of unrelenting horror." I love that not only has Driscoll used an A.I. image for this, but he has actually left in as a caption the wording he put into ChatGTP to create it.

• Will it ever get made? I suspect yes, but not like this.

Beyond the Door

https://cinebacker.com/pre-launch/beyond-the-door/

Driscoll would love to rip off The Exorcist, but since he can't do it directly he wants to do it in a roundabout way by remaking this famous Exorcist rip-off.

There's not much to the promo video but you can watch it if you want.

Like LA Takedown, this has been listed for a couple of years on the Maha Films site.

• Will it ever get made? Nah, mate.

The Transylvanians: A Rocky Horror Tribute film

https://cinebacker.com/pre-launch/the-transylvanians-a-rocky-horror-tribute-film/

Again, there's very little to the promo video beyond an announcement. Now, you might assume this would be some sort of documentary about the Rocky Horror phenomenon. But no, it's an actual sequel!

"The story follows a young priest dispatched on a peculiar mission to uncover the truth behind the mysterious disappearance of a couple from Denton. Their last known location? An eerie old Gothic house alive with wild parties, hosted by the enigmatic Dark Lord ALUCARD. Upon arrival, the priest is greeted by a colorful cast of eccentric relatives and a flamboyant group of vampires known as The Transylvanians. These glamorous, twisted undead revelers are devoted followers of the Dark Lord, embodying a world of decadence and bizarre charm."

This will allegedly have "many original cast members" but that would obviously be Christopher Biggins rather than Susan Sarandon - if this nonsense were ever to get made. Which it won't, for really obvious copyright reasons.

Crowdfunder allegedly launches in April. Don't hold your breath.

• Will it ever get made? I literally just told you: no.

Arid

https://cinebacker.com/pre-launch/arid/

This Maha Films rip-off of Dune isn't listed anywhere on the Maha Films website, which probably just means they haven't updated their site for a while and may possibly have forgotten their password. But there is at least some (A.I.) visuals in the promo video.

It will be directed by 'Gideon Quin' which is, as we all know, yet another Richard Driscoll pseudony,

For extra value, they are going to stick some dragons in there to rip off Game of Thrones a bit too.

An 'all star cast' is 'to be announced', which almost certainly means Michael Madsen, Dame Eileen Daly, stock footage of the late Tim Sizemore, 'Steve Craine', Danny Lopez and The Ask.

• Will it ever get made? Perhaps, but if so it will be almost entirely green screen and A.I.

The Girl in Black

https://cinebacker.com/pre-launch/girl-in-black/

This is an odd one because the name attached to it is John Luton, who does seem to be a real person and not just another Driscoll pseudonym. Nevertheless, this has all the usual Driscoll hallmarks, not least the unimaginative rip-off title.

There is a promo video full of generic gothic horror footage that may be from a stock library or may have been specially shot (though not necessarily for this).

John Luton has another project on Cinebacker, a six-part documentary about the First World War called The War That Changed the World. The fact that so much of the stock footage in that promo video still has Getty Images watermarks, and the captions include an obvious typo, again suggest Driscoll's direct involvement.

• Will it ever get made? I'd give this 50/50, but don't expect it for a few years.

Driscoll obviously hopes that other indie film-makers will use Cinebacker for crowdfunding, and why shouldn't they? There is a whole load of legal bumf and T&Cs and Q&As and suchlike and whatnot on the site. I'm not recommending it, but I'm not not recommending it. Let's see what happens.

Richard Driscoll incorporated Cinebacker as a company last August. The trading address, curiously, is a static caravan in a residential holiday park for the over-50s in the southern tip of Cornwall. Richard turned 65 last month (I forgot to send him a card, sorry) so why shouldn't he enjoy his retirement? And if he wants to carry on making films as long as he can stand up, I say good for him.

The Ghosts of Borley Rectory

d. Steven M Smith; w. Steven M Smith, Christopher Jolley; p. Steven M Smith, Louisa Warren, Paul G Andrews; cast: Toby Wynn-Davies, Reece Putinas, Leila Kotori, Louisa Warren, Lee Hancock, Colin Baker, Julian Sands, Christopher Ellison, Toyah Willcox

The Haunting of Borley Rectory was one of the most successful DTV features of the 2010s so it was only natural that Steven M Smith would return to ‘the most haunted house in England’ for this unrelated prequel. The bigger budget is evident in a tighter script, less rushed production and name cast including Baker and Toyah (who have several British horror credits apiece), The Bill’s Ellison, and Sands who is a veritable Borley regular, having narrated Ashley Thorpe’s animated dramadoc. The strong cast orbits around Wynn-Davies (Dogged, Nefarious), marvellously dynamic as Harry Price. The prolific Smith (15 horror features in as many years, plus several hooligan films) teams here with another key figure in the British horror boom, Louisa Warren (only 14 features but all in the last 3-4 years!) for what should be another big hit. Adroit direction of scare scenes creates a genuinely spooky and gripping feature that demonstrates how far Smith has come since his early work.

A bumper Richard Driscoll update!

I don’t know what’s going on with Richard Driscoll. Nothing new there. But this time things have got really weird.

My thanks to Paul Tanter who spotted this in The Film Catalogue and thought it smelled a little like a Driscoll joint. And he’s right

No-one else makes films ‘starring’ Michael Madsen, Tom Sizemore, Bai Ling, Robin Askwith and Colin Baker. That’s Driscoll’s stock (footage) company. But it’s directed by ‘Ross Fall’. Is that a pseudonym for Richard Driscoll?

Interestingly, the credit block on the poster doesn’t mention a director, but does list Ross Fall as producer (and DP) and Chris Newman as writer. The production company is MAHA Films, funding by Red Rock Entertainment.

This took me down an extraordinary rabbit hole. Ross Fall and Chris Newman have an extensive slate of movies in ‘production’ or development, some of them on the IMDB. Now, Ross Fall is a real person. He has credits on a bunch of British (or British-ish) horrors including Chemical Wedding, Book of Blood, Dread, Surviving Evil and World War Z (although the credit for The Devil’s Music on his IMDB page is not the Pat Higgins film of that title).

Chris Newman was (according to IMDB) the editor on Driscoll’s Highway to Hell, Conjuring: The Book of the Dead and Evil Calls, this last under the pseudonym ‘Gideon Quin’, which is a name that Driscoll has used in the past.

My apologies to Chris Newman if he is a real person, but for now I’m assuming he’s Mr D. And, as we shall see, there is plenty of other evidence to support that assumption. But one of two things is for sure. Either Richard Driscoll is collaborating, under a pseudonym, with Ross Fall. Or Richard Driscoll is collaborating, uncredited, with Ross Fall and someone named Chris Newman. Whichever way you slice it, MAHA Films’ slate is pure Driscoll. And MAHA Films’ website is pure Driscoll too. No-one else could possibly have written something as incoherent as this:

“MAHA films Ltd was set up by Writer, Producer, Director, Cinematographer & Editor, Ross Fall. After 40 years in the film industry, Ross decided to set up a production company that deals with all forms of Content in this new & exciting time. Dealing with content that could be feature films, documentaries, Live events, Series, including Youtube content. Ross have also taken the view that MAHA films will look at anything that arrives on their doorstep, to help produce or distribute if it fits into the MAHA criteria. As a production company, MAHA can offer various facilities and services to other filmmakers. Maha various equipment. They have their own lighting rig plus generator, camera’s, Panther dolly, Jib arms & a Tulip Crane as well as a post-production facility.”

Here's a photo of Ross Fall, a man who hopefully knows what he’s letting himself in for:

This is from https://mahafilms.org/about-2/ and there’s a bio of Mr Fall on there too which seems entirely legitimate, as well as obeying the basic rules of grammar, syntax, punctuation and spelling.

Let’s see what MAHA has ‘in production’, shall we? 

First up is a 12 x 30min series, Linnea Quigley’s Paranormal Truth. This was apparently produced and directed by Linnea herself (whose relationship with Driscoll goes way back, of course). It also says ‘Directed by Jeff Sheldon’ and ‘UK Producer: Ross Fall’.

Jeff Sheldon seems to have no credits beyond the MAHA films slate so may be a real person or may be Richad Driscoll/Chris Newman/Steven Craine/Gideon Quin under yet another name. However, if you click on the ‘episode guide’ link on the MAHA Films website the credits are: “Edited by Chris Newman; Directed by Jeff Sheldon & Victor Huesca; Produced by Linnea Quigley & Ross Fall.” 

That’s also the set of names in a press release that appeared a few weeks ago on various horror sites, which promised “The 12-episode first season premieres soon on DRagonFLIX!” What is DRagonFLIX? That’s Richard Driscoll’s online channel, which he has been threatening to launch for years but which has never got further than a YouTube channel of public domain titles.

There’s a 90-second trailer on YouTube and a different 90-second clip/trailer that was sent to Rue Morgue which says the series will be “available on all good platforms from April 2021”.

<checks calendar>

Incidentally, don’t bother clicking on any of the video links on the MAHA site as you’ll just get this:

Mr Driscoll and Ms Quigley have also collaborated on a ‘completed’ feature called Zombie Games:

“A cross between The Hunger Games & World War Z. When a virus destroys the planet only a small amount of humans exist. Out of those they need to fight to get into the special facility and be safe. So the Zombie Games was invented.”

Starring Driscoll, Linnea and Donna Wilkes from Jaws 2. Produced by Ross Fall, directed by Jeff Sheldon (according to this artwork) and/or “co-produced and directed by Linnea Quigley” (according to the website).

The History of the Beatles from A2Z (‘3 x 60 mins’, ‘completed’) will be one of Driscoll’s stock footage fests. (There’s a Driscoll Beatles doc floating around on YouTube which hilariously centres on an interview with the current caretaker of the church hall at which John and Paul first met.)

 

Then we come to the good stuff. Buckle Up (‘feature film’, ‘currently in production’), the film that Paul Tanter spotted, has this alternative artwork and synopsis:

“The story of ex-banger racer Jack Elger who has to honour his brothers gambling debt by picking up a rare diamond necklace from an Arab prince off the coast of Cornwall and bring it back to London before he his killed. The trick is to stay alive as they race through the streets of London’s Westend dodging bullets in the process.”

Now here’s a classic Driscoll idea if ever there was one: Sherlock Holmes and the Murder on the Orient Express! ('90 min Pilot for series', 'in production. 2nd unit filmed waiting to schedule main shoot after COVID19')

“After Sherlock Holmes tracks down Jack the Ripper he ends up on the Orient Express where another murder is committed by his deadly foe, Professor Moriarty.”

The credits are: a cast of Craine, Madsen, Sizemore, Ling and Clive Shilson (who you undoubtedly remember from his award-winning performance as ‘first detective’ in the 1986 pilot of London’s Burning). DP and producer, Ross Fall. Edited, written, produced and directed by ‘Chris Newman’.

Or perhaps you’d prefer… Kill Like Hitchcock (‘feature film', 'in production. 2nd unit filmed waiting to schedule main shoot after COVID19' – damn, that 2nd unit’s good).

“After years of trying to find the serial killer Max Boden he is finally trapped and killed on the roof of a warehouse overlooking the San Francisco bridge but in the process, his last victim Louise Linn, Whose boyfriend is the leading policeman on the case is also murdered. Now retired Police Officer LB Jefferies still can’t get that night out of his mind and the other victims Boden murdered.”

This stars Craine, Madsen and Ling of course plus… either Denzel or Denzil Washington, depending on which part of the poster you’re glancing at.

Once Upon a Time in Hollyweird (‘feature film’, ‘in production. Main unit filmed waiting to schedule second unit shoot after COVID19’) has been floating around for a while. What has changed is the credit block. Where once it said ‘Edited by Mark Brindle, written produced and directed by Richard Driscoll’, now it’s ‘written, produced, directed and edited by Chris Newman’.

The production company has changed from ‘DRagon and House of Fear’ to ‘MAHA Productions’ and we have some cast changes. Out goes Jason Donovan; in comes the aforementioned Donna Wilkes plus Virginia Madsen and “archive footage of David Carradine, Dennis Hooper and Harry Dean Stanton”! How much do you think the archive footage of David Carradine will get paid this time?

Oh, and I checked just in case there was anyone on IMDB actually called Dennis Hooper but no, he definitely means Dennis Hopper.

Next!

It’s... Legend. Isn't it? No, it’s The Book of Nightmares (‘feature film’, ‘in production. Main unit filmed waiting to schedule second unit shoot after COVID19’) being promoted with a risibly copyright-ignoring image of a world famous actor in an iconic make-up.

This is more of Driscoll’s Crowley festish: “An interlocking anthology of stories in the style of “Clive Barker’s Hellraiser” about a Diary written by Occultist Aleister Crowley called The Book of Nightmares which gets sold at auction. Each owner who possesses the Diary ends up dying in the most horrific way before the book returns to the original owner, who then sells it AGAIN…”

Craine, Sizemore, Ling, Madsen and Lysette Anthony head the cast. ‘Written for the screen’ by Chris Newman Produced by Ross Fall, And frankly, given Driscoll's inability to proof-read anything he writes, I'm amazed it's not about Aleister Crowley's dairy.

But wait, there’s more: “The Book of Nightmares is a Psychological Fantasy Horror movie in the tradition of Hellraiser and Angel Heart”

But wait, it gets even better: “Based on the Novella & audio book ‘The Book of Nightmares’ read by Colin Baker (Dr Who) to be released 2021” Well, we're all waiting for that.

By way of a change, how about “A Magical Children's feature film in pre-production” - Charlie and George Save Christmas. Produced by Ross Fall, music by Aled Jones, starring Brian Blessed as Santa. No mention of Chris Newman or Steven Craine (or Madsen etc.) so this might be a Ross Fall thing that Driscoll’s not involved with.

 

Then we have another Linnea Quigley gig, The Lost Tapes (‘feature film’. ‘in production’): 

“A group of students discover an old box of VHS tapes at their school which is about to be thrown out. As soon as they view the tapes they discover footage of the missing student’s everyone thought was dead. With a couple of cameras the group goes to investigate.”

This is either produced by Quigley and Fall, directed by Quigley (website) or produced by Fall, written, produced and directed by Jeff Sheldon (artwork).

Or how about Craine, Ling, Madsen and Sizemore – together at last for the first time! – in Shark Attack (‘feature film’, ‘in production. 2nd unit filmed waiting to schedule main shoot after COVID19’). 

“When a heist involving stolen diamonds goes wrong it is not the Police you have got to worry about.” 

Not to be confused with the 1999 Casper Van Dien classic Shark Attack.

 

And finally (for now) we have The Long Night (‘90 min Pilot for series’, ‘in production. 2nd unit filmed waiting to schedule main shoot after COVID19’). 

“When a stranger comes to the Great Wall pulling along a stretcher with what looks like a dead man, it only becomes time when the Zombie King pays a visit.”

This classic will feature “actors from the award winning tv show Game of Thrones. Kristan Nairn. James Cosmo. David Bradley. Written Produced & Directed by Chris Newman. Produced by Ross Fall.” This may be related to the Game of Thorns idea that Driscoll was kicking around while he was in prison.

MAHA Films also has some titles ‘in development’, in other words even that mythical ‘2nd unit’ hasn’t started shooting.

There’s Beyond the Door: 

“Evil grows beyond the door in this 2021 remake of the 1974 classic which made $17 million dollars in the US alone in 1974 Now MAHA films brings you this remake which starts production 2021.”

There’s Dinado, starring Linnea Quigley and Debra Lamb: 

“When 2 scream queens decide to take a short cut to their next convention they get caught in an earth quake which causes their truck to be swallowed by the road beneath them. When they wake up they find themselves in a world full of Dinasaurs.”

 

 

There’s Call Me Joker, the idea which was previously floated around as Jester, probably based around footage from Assassin’s Revenge, although this version has a completely new synopsis: 

“The dreadful nightmares of John Hardcastle when he was in Afganistan never go away, they just form into a living hell.  Now the retired soldier just drives his taxi through the night. He has lost everything, family, friends and loved ones. Nobody or nothing matters anymore…”

And there’s Mata Hari: 

“As World War One starts the German’s recruit the exotic dancer Mata Hari as a spy to help them win the war. When the Americans hear of the outbreak they hire the illusionist Houdini to help them.” 

This ‘stars’ Bai Ling, whose unrelated character in Conjuring: Book of the Dead was called that. And it just occurred to me: this could be where MAHA Films gets its name.

So there you are: that’s anything up to 15 ‘new’ Richard Driscoll/Chris Newman(/Jeff Sheldon?) productions in the pipeline. Interestingly, all mention of films in production/development at DRagon Studios has disappeared from that website at about the same time that this one has launched.

Will we ever see any of these ‘films’? There’s literally no way to tell, although I would say Once Upon a Time in Hollyweird and Call Me Joker are the front runners – those could turn up some day in some form under some title.

For now, let’s just enjoy a bumper crop of Driscoll-ian weirdness, be it unauthorised use of a still from Legend, or Sherlock Holmes solving an Agatha Christie mystery, or just an inability to spell ‘Denzel’. God bless you, Mr D. It’s good to see you’re still making films, and determined to stick at it until you eventually get it right.

Bram Stoker’s Van Helsing

d./w./p. Steve Lawson; cast: Mark Topping, Charlie Bond, Tom Hendryk, Joe Street, Helen Crevel

The latest feature from Lawson’s Leicester-based Creativ Studios (funded and distributed by High Fliers) is based on Dracula, or at least the part of Dracula after the Demeter arrives but before the Harkers return from Budapest. Reigning British horror princess Bond has a ball as the ailing Lucy who goes from simpering coquette to full-on monster. Topping is subtle and restrained in the title role, dealing with Lucy’s illness and the jealousy between fiancée Arthur and spurned John (there’s no Quincy). Neither V-word nor D-word is mentioned, and the Count is seen only briefly as a faceless figure. Steve says that he treated this sub-story as analogous to The Exorcist and it’s a refreshing take, although the film is distinctly short on action. The overly talkie second act drags somewhat but things perk up when Lucy starts flying to London to attack street whores (not part of the novel!), murders which The Times credits to Jack the Ripper. Creativ regular Crevel pops up at the end as Mina, teasing a possible sequel. Filmed in 2020 at Pipewell Hall, Northants and against a variety of effective digital backgrounds.

Broken Spirits

d. Steven Hines; w./p. Geoff Harrison; cast: Amy Littler, Ryan Leadbetter, Alec Walters, Graham Bridges, Steven Hines, Alex Labelle, Ashley Riley, Paul Wilkes, Paul Malone

Produced by staff and students at Cowley International College, St Helens (30 years after it served as a location for Chariots of Fire) this amateur feature does a surprisingly good job of maintaining its central mystery. A trouble-making student clashes with a strong-willed teacher but when things get out of hand, he swears he has actually backed off and blames the ghost of a former pupil. Unknown to all but a few colleagues, this teacher was involved in that boy’s accidental death. As her mental state deteriorates, she struggles to cope with the pressure. Camera-work and sound are nothing to write home about but the film does a good job of walking an ambiguous line between ghost story and psychological thriller until the final revelation. A subplot about a ghost-hunting TV show filming an episode on the premises is a red herring. Rugby international James Roby has a cameo. There was a single local screening in December 2011 and a DVD the following year.

The Nights Before Christmas

d. Paul Tanter; w. Simon Phillips, Paul Tanter; p. Simon Phillips, Paul Tanter, Ken Bressers; cast: Simon Phillips, Sayla de Goede, Kate Schroeder, Marc Gammal, Keegan Chambers, Shannon Cotter

This sequel (with prequel flashbacks) to Once Upon a Time at Christmas functions as a stand-alone film. One reason why that enjoyable 2017 slasher stood out from the crowded psycho-in-a-Santa-suit subgenre is because it was structured as a police procedural, and the same trick works here. Schroeder is terrific as the FBI agent searching for a link between the new victims (which turn out to be not quite as fun – or obvious – as last time). At 104 minutes this is a tad too long and could probably have lost a few of the numerous times when Schroeder deduces “It’s an actual list.” Nevertheless, it’s good festive bloody fun with Phillips and de Goede hamming it up gleefully and plenty of production value on screen. Tanter pops up in the stand-out scene, a boardroom massacre. Originally announced as Twice Upon…, this was shot in Canada in January 2019 and premiered 10 months later in Toronto. A third outing for Santa and Mrs Claus, One Christmas Night in a Toy Store, is in development.

Saint Maud

d./w. Rose Glass; p. Oliver Kassman, Andrea Cornwell; cast: Morfydd Clark, Jennifer Ehle, Lily Knight, Lily Frazer

A rare theatrical release during lockdown, Saint Maud consequently received a level of promotion – and hence hype – that it doesn’t really warrant and cannot possibly live up to. It’s a well-crafted psychological horror with powerful religious motifs and a superb lead performance by Clark. But it’s not the great white hope of British horror and certainly not the scariest film of the year. Maud/Katie is a home carer employed by an agency apparently unaware that she lost her nursing job after something appallingly bloody happened (glimpsed in a momentary flashback). A devout Catholic, Maud is sure God has a purpose for her, which might be saving the soul of her charge, a disabled, bisexual, wine-swigging ex-dancer. As her grip on reality dissipates – God literally speaks to her (in Welsh!) – our concern for Maud’s fragile mental health increases. But despite some wince-inducing moments of self-harm, there’s no real horror till the end when debut writer-director Glass suddenly throws in blood, violence and unnecessary VFX. A FilmFour/BFI production, Saint Maud feels very mainstream and restrained, lacking the punch of a true low-budget indie.